Obama 'causes Commons chaos'

Gordon Brown and David Cameron have sensationally clashed in the Commons over Barack Obama's victory - leading to a SPLIT THAT MAY NEVER HEAL, Happy Claptrap can report today.

The prime minister said Mr. Obama, America's first black president, had triumphed because he embodied the same values as Labour. "In electing Barack Obama, America has proved that it is a nation eager for change. And because my party shares many of the same policies it shows that we, too, are eager for change.”

But twinkle-eyed Tory leader Dave Cameron accused Mr Brown of offering more of the same. “How can the prime minister offer a real change, when by his own admission he and Mr. Obama are the same?” He also taunted Mr Brown over his recent claim that "this was no time for a novice".

And as the debate raged on, Mr. Brown hit back. “Just like Mr. Obama, I am new to leading a country in such difficult times. So we both have much in common, are both the same in offering real change - and I very much look forward to working with him,” he thundered to the approval of Labour backbenchers, many of whom HAD WOKEN UP ESPECIALLY. "Meanwhile, the Conservative Party has consistently opposed Mr Obama's policies to support the US economy."

To snoars of delight from his own backbenchers, Mr. Cameron responded by underlining his own credentials as the man of change. "Rather than accept US proposals, which would have made us the same, we consistently opposed them, which makes us different. We truly are the party of change - the same as we have always been!"

Even though Mr. Obama becomes America’s first black president, sources have confirmed he will live in the White House.