Blair announces ‘Big Brother’ elections

London 21/09/2005

ASTONISHING proposals to revive flagging interest in the electoral process have been disclosed to selected members of the press, Happy Claptrap can reveal.

Tony Blair is determined to push ahead with a Big Brother style election in which members of the public will vote to expel one party leader ‘from the house’ every week. The winner will then be asked to form a government and could also expect to earn hundreds of pounds through EXCLUSIVE magazine interviews and sponsorships, according to experts.

But Tory spokesman Michael Howard was quick to blast the plans as ‘sinister’, ‘a green light for illegal immigrants’ and ‘will we be allowed to stay up for The West Wing?’

The turnout of Mr. Blair’s constituency at the last election was disappointing, despite every vote cast automatically entering a free prize draw to win a copy of his latest CD 'Blair plays Banjo'.